Dreamer( Soñador)

Once upon a time there was a noble king. He lived in a beautiful castle overlooking green fields. An evil storm cast darkness over his castle, and before he knew it, dark knights had begun to take away his kingdom, one piece at a time. But our king was a warrior, and he knew if he could find his magic horse he could restore the kingdom to greatness. He was not like most kings. He was quiet and kind. Everyone loved the king which he may not have known. He searched and searched and finally rescued his horse from a raging river. But by the time he'd freed his horse, his kingdom was gone and he had given up. But the horse knew better than he. The horse took him over mountain ranges and across raging rivers. When it finally looked like they would die the horse asked him to trust him. The King didn't know if the horse had really spoken to him or he just hadn't had anything to eat in a few days. Not soon after the horse tried to climb a mountain so steep that the king was sure it would be their deaths. But the horse reached the top. And at the top, they found his kingdom, restored. All those who loved him greeted the king with a pie and coffee.

Satisfaction of Self.

At times I wish to dream, my hopes disappeared like vapour in the sky. My visions were too blurred, like I'm stuck in a cloud of fog. It's getting dark, too dark to see. At times I ask myself "Mr Dreamer, What do you aspire to be?" I long for greatness but it's too high to reach, my indulgence is stronger than gravity; it's a weapon of mass destruction pointed at my future. My spirit is longing to be a weapon of mass destruction for God, but I'm lost in the pursuit of masculinity.

I got this cathode ray tube on my face planting worms of deception on my brain. I thought I was amazing! But this Trojan Horse is leaving my thoughts x_rated. I try too hard to detox but I insult my intelligence, only the work of a Holy Ghost Avast can clear such a destruction.

Believe me I'm not deaf, I can hear your voice loud and clear. I'm noble in thought, but I lack the will to act on your command. If this was the Great I Am He would've said "The spirit is willing but the flesh is not". At times I wish I could crab peace, my peace of mind was troubled by needles of despair stuck in  my cerebrum, like I'm losing my mind.

I looked at myself  in the mirror and myself told me "your actions speak so loud I can't hear what you're saying" I felt retarded. How can I fire my piece at the beast if I can't meditate on Philippians 4 vs 8? A soot of self inflection for final exit is building up on my cerebral matter day to day. What Happened to Me? I'm a fraud, a deceit with personality and a false advertisement with treachery camouflaged with a grin.

Now I see with a clear eyed view, if I'm gonna make it I need to put the fire off. I've been intoxicating myself inhaling the smoke in the satisfaction of self. The light in me is brighter than the darkness of my life, so I pray to the Father, The Son, and The Holy Ghost to watch over my life, so that I can conquer myself.

A letter from a friend in Cuba

Goodman

Even after this long, im pained still at what I had read on the email
you'd sent me. Just before leaving Cuba for home, Dumisani said something
that really touched me: that in his life he has made no mistake, except
only the one he did not learn from. Youngman, it is no time to look down
at yourself, it is time to find courage, to find purpose in yourself
because yes for even you, there is still hope.

Food and agricultural sciences are your passion and this I can attest to.
The problem maybe is in the way you are approaching the dream you have,
how then that you consider another routes such as doing a B.Ed degree and
in it specialize with food and agricultural sciences. Word has it that
there is an aboundance of bursaries available for teaching. Also, many an
agricultural school are closing down due to lack of educators.

In making a decision as to where lies your passion, it is key to be honest
and very realistic with yourself brother, to learn from where you have
gone wrong and realise that you are a black young. The life for a black
southafrican is a very trivial one- all he is to attaine is all he's to
sweat for and for him time is factor. You cannot continue relaxing
blackchild, what your hands find to do is what you work on. The world is
too busy that the one who says it cannot be done will be interupted by the
one doing it.

I hope that both your mother and your brother are well still. I wish them
both good health and a peaceful life. I know that if there is any reason
to stand up again and challenge this life once more, it is them two. We
love and believe in you still brother.

Kind regards
Thoabala